


Support

by nanuk_dain



Series: Drift Compatible [13]
Category: Pacific Rim (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Team Hot Dads, disturbing imagery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2017-12-28
Packaged: 2019-02-23 06:55:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13184709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanuk_dain/pseuds/nanuk_dain
Summary: After reporting Scott to the PPDC higher ups, effectively ending his career as well as condemning him to a life in prison, Herc calls Stacker who is halfway around the planet. He needs to hear his voice or he's going to lose it entirely.





	Support

**Author's Note:**

> We're jumping back in time a bit with this fic, to when Scott was discharged from the PPDC. I've had this fic sitting on my hard drive for three years, halfway done, and now it hit me how to finish it. I hope you like it and I wish you all a Happy New Year ^_^

_Hong Kong, September 21st 2019_

 

Herc nearly pukes into the Conn-Pod. 

They're in the middle of a Kaiju attack and Scott's side just took a massive hit, he's a bit dazed for a moment or two, and that's when Herc is hit with Scott's memory so hard, so unexpectedly that it knocks the breath out of him. It's a memory Herc has never seen before, and it's so intense and repulsive that Herc loses control over Lucky Seven for a moment or two while his stomach cramps in horrified disgust. It's enough for the Kaiju to land two more painful hits, one to Lucky Seven's midriff and one to Herc's side of the head. Right that second Herc is unable to care, he's too caught up in Scott's memory.

Scott likes young girls, _really young_ girls, and he's anything but gentle. He's cruel, he enjoys hurting them. He gets drunk on the power he has over them, he wallows in their pain and their fear, they excite him, turn him on. Herc sees way too young faces, scared eyes, tears, blond pigtails in a painfully hard grip and then he tries with all his might to block out what's following. He doesn't want to see, it's so horrifying and revolting, and he knows he won't ever be able to forget what he just saw, what he learned about his own brother. Herc is certain that if the memory had in any way included or even threatened Chuck, he would have killed Scott right here and now in the Jaeger Conn-Pod without a moment's hesitation, consequences be damned.

Instead he screams in something that is rage and disgust and shock and helplessness and so many more emotions that need to break out of him before he explodes, then he's hit with Lucky Seven's sensory input when the Kaiju's tail connects in a powerful blow with Lucky Seven's back. It forces his focus back on the situation at hand. Right now it doesn't matter what he wants to do to Scott, what Scott deserves for his actions. Right now the only thing that matters is that they're responsible for the lives of over ten million people in the city of Hong Kong, and those people don't deserve to die because of Scott.

Herc pulls himself together and makes an effort to even out the ripples in the drift in order to reinstate their fighting capability. He knows he can't pilot solo, he needs Scott to finish this mission, and one quick look at the controls tell him that Lucky Seven can't take many more hits before they'll be incapacitated. They need to get their act together and do their job, and they need to do it fast.

The memory is shielded again, hidden so completely that Herc would wonder whether it was real if it weren't for the images he can still see before his mind's eye, edged into his own memory until the day he dies. Yet Herc is certain that Scott knows he saw the memory. It's not like Herc is bothering to shield his reaction to it, after all. His urge to rip Scott out of the harness and make him pay for all the pain he caused is still so strong that Herc has to consciously concentrate on suppressing it.

"Herc..." Scott begins almost hesitantly, a trait that he'd rarely shown before in his life. He knows there will be consequences, Herc can gather that through the drift, and he fears them. He feels Herc's rage and doesn't know how to deal with it because until now, Herc always forgave him in the end. 

"Don't." Herc growls under his breath and sends a clear message through the drift that one more word from Scott will make his restraints snap. He feels Scott flinch back over the drift, then he catches himself and all emotions leave their drift and they concentrate on fighting back, on killing the Kaiju that's still hellbent on eradicating Hong Kong and whatever other city it can get to before being killed. Herc channels his aggression into their attack, allowing it to enter his connection to the Jaeger in a way he never did before, and it feels good to find a target for it since he can't attack Scott.

They defeat the Kaiju in the end, but it's a close call and the damage to Lucky Seven is extensive. They manoeuvre the Jaeger back to the Shatterdome and as soon at their harnesses are disengaged, before the door to the Conn-Pod has even opened, Herc is in Scott's face, teeth bared in an instinctive threat. He regrets that the drivesuit doesn't give him anywhere to really grab Scott and crush him into a wall because he really wants to do that right now. Instead he presses Scott back against the harness with his forearm against Scott's throat cutting off his air supply and rendering him immobile. Scott was never one to back down from a fight, but for once he's frozen in place.

"If you come anywhere near Chuck ever again, I will kill you, Scott." Herc is surprised how calm his voice sounds, it's the complete opposite to what he feels on the inside. "You will own up for what you did, and you will pay, and you will _never ever_ set foot in our lives again, is that understood?"

Scott frowns in a mixture of surprise and wariness and even a tinge of fear. He holds Herc's gaze for a long moment and then nods slowly, his lips pressed into a thin line. He's all serious for once and Herc can tell that he understands that Herc means it. He knows that Herc will not forgive this like he did with all the other crazy, reckless, inconsiderate and dangerous things Scott did since they were kids. This time a line was crossed, they're beyond the point of no return. 

"I will report this right now. You better remove your shit from our quarters before I get back, because you will never set foot in there again." Herc gives a shove that he knows squeezes painfully on Scott's wind pipe, then he lets go and steps back before he forgets himself. "Security will get you from the drivesuit room once you're out of the suit. You'd better be there when they come."

Herc doesn't follow it up with a threat, he can tell that Scott understands without him putting it in words. Herc is sure he never saw Scott afraid of anything, but right now there's fear somewhere deep in his eyes. It doesn't feel like a triumph that he's the one who put it there.

The door to the Conn-Pod hisses when the air pressure is released and a swarm of J-Techs enter in the usual hustle and bustle that follows combat. Herc takes another step back, eyes still fixed on Scott, then he turns around and stalks out of the Conn-Pod.

Herc doesn't even change out of his drivesuit before he knocks on Marshal Lai Ho's door. According to the clock he's inside for just forty minutes, but they feel like hours to Herc. He gives his report as free of emotion as he can, but he knows he doesn't quite manage. Ho picks up on it immediately, listening quietly and only asking questions to clarify things. After listening for a few minutes, she calls in the head of security who sends out four men to arrest Scott in the drive suit room. Then they get a sketch artist and Herc reluctantly relives the memory in as much detail as possible to describe situations and the girls he saw. He's horrified to realise that he can count at least seven little girls which he can describe closely enough to make it possible to find them. 

When he leaves the Marshal's office, he feels sick and exhausted to bone and yet he's still brimming with that helpless rage that overwhelmed him back in the Conn-Pod. He makes a point to avoid the hallways where he might come across the security leading Scott off to the holding cells because he's not sure what he'll do if he sees his face again. He's infinitely glad that Scott has long since finished getting his drivesuit removed when Herc gets to the drivesuit room where the techs are still waiting for him.

In the end he does puke, but only later when he's in the bathroom of the quarters that he doesn't share with Scott any longer. It doesn't stop until he retches dryly and his empty stomach contracts painfully. Herc forces himself off the floor, rinses his mouth and washes his face. He feels wrung out and exhausted and so utterly shocked and disgusted. He leans heavily on the wash basin for a long moment, then he reaches for the towel and dries his face before he leaves the bathroom.

Of course that is when Chuck bursts into their quarters. Herc needs just one look into his face to know that he already heard about Scott's arrest. No details probably, but enough to gather that it was on Herc's report, enough make up his mind and come to the conclusion that Herc is to blame. Herc wishes he'd be surprised that Chuck blames him, but he really isn't.

Chuck is clearly angry, it comes off him in waves even before he's opened his mouth. Herc tries to brace himself for the onslaught that he knows it coming, but Chuck's words still manage to find their target effortlessly. They always do.

"Why do you make everybody I love go away?" Chuck shouts, and the betrayal is clear on his face. "First mom and now uncle Scott! I hate you!"

That's all he yells before he turns on his heel and runs out of the quarters. He even manages to slam the heavy metal door on his way out which is quite a feat. His words hit Herc like a blow to the stomach and leave him breathless. Chuck is only sixteen, a hormonally imbalanced teenager, and on top of that he's angry. He doesn't understand what happened and he hurts over the loss of Scott. Of course it's Herc he lashes out at, he's always to blame for everything that is wrong with Chuck's life. It's what most teenagers at that age seem to think about their parents. 

Herc knows all that, but it doesn't ease the stabbing pain he feels at every word Chuck shouted at him. He closes his eyes and sags against the wall until his head rests against the cold concrete. How is he supposed to deal with that? He can't tell Chuck what Scott did, not that it would change a thing. Chuck wouldn't believe him, he's always preferred Scott to Herc. Of course he did. It's not Scott who left Angela to die. It's not Scott who had to be strict and keep Chuck in line. 

Herc tries to breathe through it, to calm down, to convince himself that Chuck didn't really mean what he said. It doesn't quite work. 

Finally he allows his legs to give and slides down the wall he's already leaning against. Herc fishes his phone out of his pocket and dials Stacker, not caring what time it is in Anchorage. He has to talk to him, he needs to hear his voice, he needs it to calm him down and give him focus. He feels so... troubled, angry, shaken, shocked, disgusted, disappointed, ashamed, confused, guilty... all together. How the hell could Scott do that? His baby brother? How could he have such a dark side without Herc ever noticing it? This is the guy he'd trusted with his son, for crying out loud! 

"Herc." Stacker's voice rumbles low over the phone, warm and welcoming, and Herc can tell right away that he woke him up. It's probably the middle of the night in Anchorage, which means that Stacker won't have heard about Scott yet.

"Stacks..." Herc doesn't know where to start. How do you tell something like this to a man who is the father of a little girl himself? Herc closes his eyes and forces the words out of his mouth, one after the other, the whole disgusting truth, and he can't keep his voice even. He seeks Stacker out over their ghost drift, trying to let him feel what Herc can't put in words. Their ghost drift is weaker now that they haven't seen each other in so long, now that the physical distance between them is so huge, but he needs the reassurance of Stacker's warmth now, he needs to feel him all around him, even if it's just in his mind.

"I just... I don't get it, Stacks." Herc croaks when he has laid out all the facts, staring at the wall opposite of him. "How didn't I pick up on it before? I drifted with Scott so many times! I should have seen it, or at least have an inkling! I could have prevented this! I could have saved those girls the pain and..."

"Don't go there, Herc." Stacker sounds hard. "Don't _ever_ blame yourself for what he did. He's responsible for his own actions, he's a grown man. It was neither your task nor your duty to prevent things you didn't even know about. You _never could have_ prevented them. Scott must be very good at shielding his thoughts, probably due to very long experience of hiding them. If he didn't want you to pick up on it, then you had no chance to do so."

"If it had been Chuck..." Herc finds himself voicing the one thought that's been snowballing around his mind ever since he was hit with Scott's memory. It's the thing he fears most, that Chuck was hurt in any way by Scott.

"But it wasn't Herc, and he never was at risk." Stacker replies evenly but firmly because he knows what he's saying is true. Chuck is not a little girl, that's what kept him safe. "You will lose yourself if you keep on exploring all the what-ifs, but it still won't change a thing."

Herc deflates and closes his eyes again, trying to regain his composure. He wishes Stacker was here, because he really needs to lean against him, feel his arms around him to hold him together. But he isn't here, Stacker is in Anchorage while Herc is in Hong Kong. There's an ocean between them right now, and there's no way to see each other, _touch_ each other anytime soon. Herc craves it with an intensity that almost overwhelms him, but he was always very disciplined, very realistic, and he won't allow himself to give in. 

He has to be strong for Chuck who won't understand why his uncle Scott is gone and why his father, Scott's own brother, was the one who made him leave. Herc knows that he will never tell Chuck. He doesn't want to tarnish his memories of his uncle - not for Scott's sake, but for Chuck's. He knows how much Chuck loves his uncle, loves that he's fun and reckless and up to all kinds of shenanigans whereas Herc is the strict father who always says 'no'. Chuck has lost too many people he loved, Herc won't be the one taking his memories of Scott, too. 

"Chuck hates me." Herc says before he can hold the words back, and he can hear himself how tired he sounds, how resigned and weary. He never meant to say those words out loud, but now that they're out, they almost crush him. "He just told me to my face."

"Herc, listen to me." Stacker's voice is gentle now, like a soothing caress that he can almost physically feel. "Chuck doesn't hate you. You just happen to be the aim of all his anger and blame. In this situation every parent would be, it's not specifically you."

"I know. Doesn't make it hurt any less, though." Herc replies honestly before falling silent. Stacker is quiet on the other end, he knows there's nothing he can say.

"I wish you were here." Herc whispers after a moment, and he barely recognises his own voice. It's very low, very rough, very raw. It reflects everything he's feeling right now. He's close to the end of his rope, he needs a moment to recharge so that he has the strength to not only deal with Scott, but also steel himself against the razor-sharp words of his son. He knows he hasn't heard the last of it. Chuck is not the forgive and forget kind of guy, and right now Herc isn't able to withstand his well-aimed verbal spears.

"I've got you, Herc." Stacker's low voice rumbles soothingly in his ear and then there's a soft wave of warmth wrapping around him. It's a feeling of comfort and love that he recognises as Stacker's way of embracing him even when they're thousands of kilometres apart, the closest they can get right now. Herc allows the tension to leave his shoulders and consciously relaxes his cramped muscles all over his body. 

"Thanks, Stacks." Herc says after simply indulging in the warm comfort for a long while. He already feels better than he did twenty minutes ago. Not good, but better. It's a beginning.

"Always." He can feels the soft smile in Stacker's words even if he can't see it. His voice is warm and caring and sincere and feels like a caress."And Herc, don't be a stranger." 

Herc can't help a dry chuckle that almost gets stuck in his throat. He recognises those words, remembers them from those dark times after Angie's death. Stacker meant it then, and he means it know. He wants to be there for Herc, he wants him to know that he doesn't have to deal with all of this on his own. 

"I won't be." Herc replies once he's found his voice again. 

After they hang up, Herc sighs deeply and lets his head fall back against the wall, the phone still cradled in his hand. He resolves to give Chuck an hour to calm down, then he'll go after him and get him for dinner. 

No matter what Chuck may throw at him, Herc won't allow him to push him away.


End file.
